Hang Twelve lets out a devastated groan.

“You just ripped a boy's dreams,” Boone tells Sunny.

“Not necessarily,” Dave the Love God says with a smug smile.

“Don't even start,” Sunny says.

“Is it my bad,” Dave asks, “that women love me?”

It's not, really. Dave the Love God has a face and physique that would have caused a run on marble in ancient Greece. But it's not even so much Dave's body that gets him sex as it is his confidence. Dave is confident that he's going to get laid, and he's in a profession that puts him in a perfect position to have a shot at every snow-zone turista who comes to San Diego to get tanned. He's a lifeguard, and this is how he got his moniker, because Johnny Banzai, who completes the New York Times crossword in ink, said, “You're not a ‘life guard’; you're a ‘love god.’ Get it?”

Yeah, the whole Dawn Patrol got it, because they have all seen Dave the Love Guard crawl up to his lifeguard tower while guzzling handfuls of vitamin E to replace the depletion from the night before and get ready for the night ahead.

“They actually give me binoculars,” he marveled to Boone one day, “with the explicit expectation that I will use them to look at scantily clad women. And some people say there's no God.”

So if any hominid with a package could get an all-female outrigger canoe team member (or several of them) to issue a gender exemption for a night or two, it would be Dave, and judging by the self-satisfied lascivious smile on his grille right now, he probably has.

Hang Twelve is still not convinced. “Yeah, but, fish tacos?”

“It depends on the kind of fish in the taco,” says High Tide, nй Josiah Pamavatuu, weighing in on the subject.