“I do not think so. Not get pregnant. Is O.K.”

He trusted her. Later, as she slept, he wondered what exactly she’d meant. That she couldn’t have kids? Or that she was taking something herself, to make doubly sure? If so, what would the Virgin Mary have to say about that? Let’s hope she isn’t relying on the rhythm method, he suddenly thought. Guaranteed to fail on a regular basis and keep the Pope as happy as Larry.

Time passed. She met Gary and Melanie; they took to her. She didn’t tell them what to do; they told her, and she went along with it. They also asked her some questions he’d never dared, or cared, to ask.

“Andrea, are you married?”

“Can we watch TV as long as we like?”

“Were you married?”

“If I ate three, would I be sick?”

“Why aren’t you married?”

“How old are you?”

“What team do you support?”

“You got any children?”

“Will you take me to the toilet?”

“Are you and Dad getting married?”

He learned the answers to some of these questions. Like any sensible woman, Andrea wasn’t telling her age. One night, in the dark, after he’d delivered the kids back and was too upset for sex, as he always was on those occasions, he said, “Do you think you could love me?”

“Yes, I think I would love you.”

“Is that a would or a could?”

“What is the difference?”

He paused. “There’s no difference. I’ll take either. I’ll take both. I’ll take whatever you’ve got to give.”

He didn’t know how it started, the next bit. Because he was beginning to fall in love with her, or because he didn’t really want to? Or wanted to but was afraid? Or was it that, deep down, he had an urge to fuck everything up? That’s what his wife — ex-wife — had said to him one morning over breakfast: “Look, Vernon, I don’t hate you, I really don’t. I just can’t live with you because you always fuck things up.” Her statement seemed to come out of the blue. True, he snored, and dropped his clothes where he shouldn’t, and watched the normal amount of sports on TV. But he came home on time, loved his kids, didn’t chase other women. In some people’s eyes, that was the same as fucking things up.