So you might ask, if I had a rich sugar daddy who looked good, adored me, let me get my education, and kept me and my brother in the finest condition, why was I so unhappy? Well, I can tell you! G was a lot older than me and the truth was he just couldn’t keep up. Even though he had the right package, the goods just didn’t function like I needed them to. Besides, G didn’t trust women so he was sexually limited. He didn’t eat pussy and he didn’t tongue kiss, which were two things I was dying for. G said pussy was nasty and he only put his dick in it because he had to.

I remember the night G made me his. It was two years ago and even though I was only seventeen, I was more than ready. I had always been a sexual person. I started masturbating as soon as I discovered what my clitoris was, but fear of my grandmother had kept me from messing with boys. One time I got a sex flick from my girlfriend Rashida and snuck it home and watched it while Grandmother took Jimmy to the doctor. Seeing all of those hard dicks made me so hot I tried to push a cold fat cucumber up inside me, but it hurt too bad and I had to stop.

G had been looking at me for a long time and I knew it. I was a senior in high school and I worked part time at a beauty shop on Amsterdam Ave run by Dominicans. G used to park his freshly waxed car outside the shop and just watch me through the window. All those old women in there swore he was looking at them and they would be posing all up in the window and shit, trying to get his attention. They just couldn’t believe a big-time playa like him wanted my young dumb ass.

A month later I graduated from high school and the next day my grandmother laid down for a quick nap and died in her sleep. G came by the apartment with a sympathy card and enough cash for us to put her away nicely. Like most people I was scared of the dead, but I was even more afraid of cemeteries and dark holes. When I was little some hysterical saint from the First Baptist Church had almost pushed me into my mother’s open grave, and that was the last time I’d stepped foot inside a cemetery.