"Will both of you mos take a Xanax andshut the fuck up? Go bake some pastries or something. Beau—goddamnit!Speak to me!"

"Naomi Campbell, Helena Christensen, CindyCrawford, Sheryl Crow, David Charvet, Courteney Cox, Harry Connick,Jr., Francisco Clemente, Nick Constantine, Zoe Cassavetes, NicolasCage, Thomas Calabro, Cristi Conway, Bob Collacello, Whitfield Crane,John Cusack, Dean Cain, Jim Courier, Roger Clemens, Russell Crowe,Tia Carrere and Helena Bonham Carter—but I'm not sure if sheshould be under B or C."

"Ingrid Chavez! Ingrid Chavez!" Ishout up. "Has Ingrid Chavez fucking RSVP'd or not?"

"Victor, celebs and their overly attentive PR reps arecomplaining that your answering machine isn't working," Beaucalls down. "They say it's playing thirty seconds of `LoveShack' and then only five seconds to leave a message."

"It's a simple question. Yes or No is the answer. What elsecould these people possibly have to say to me? It's not a difficultquestion: Are you coming to the dinner and the club opening or areyou not? Is that hard to grasp? And you look just like Uma Thurman,baby."

"Victor, Cindy is not `these people,'Veronica Webb is not `these people,' Elaine Irwin is not `thesepeople'—"

"Beau! How are the As shaping up? Kenny Kenny, don't pinch Bongolike that."

"All nine of them?" Beau calls down. "Carol Alt, PedroAlmodovar, Dana Ashbrook, Kevyn Aucoin, Patricia, Rosanna, David andAlexis Arquette and Andre Agassi, but no Giorgio Armani or PamelaAnderson."

"Shit." I light another cigarette,then look over at the Details girl. "Um, I mean that in agood way."

"So it's like . . . a good shit?" sheasks.

"Uh-huh. Hey Beau!" I call up. "Makesure all the monitors are either on that virtual-reality videotape orfor god's sake MTV or something. I passed a screen that had VH1 onit, and some fat hick in a ten-gallon hat was weeping—"