‘A private investigator?’

‘Yes, I’ve had dozens of them. Will you come – will you come and help me get her back.’

‘I don’t believe this. You can’t just go down there on a vague report – can’t you get Interpol to check.’

Her voice rose, ‘Those pricks – do me a goddamn favour. But you’re different, you’d get her.’

‘I’m sorry, look it’s late…’

‘We could drive on down there, to Algeciras, I’d read MacNeice to you, I…’

‘Stop it! Just stop it all to hell. You need help, but not any kind I can provide.’

Now she dropped her arms, seemed to shrink.

I took her arm, moved her to the door, opened it and had to push her out. She stood outside, like little Orphan Annie, said, ‘You’ll come to Agadir, you just don’t know it yet but, I promise you that – on my little girl’s head.’

I closed the door, said, ‘Dream on lady.’

She stood outside the door and I could hear her say, ‘David – David, did you ever hear what Kafka said,

“No people sing with such

pure voices

as those who live in

deepest hell.”’

‘Indigent! I don’t friggin’ believe it. You’ve got to be bloody joking – c’mon!’ – Yelling at the very height of my lungs.

Doc took it all, well, almost, and replied, ‘Would I joke about that. It’s the term they use and a right vicious one.’

I couldn’t take it in – how could he be skint-

‘How can you be skint?’

‘Don’t get righteous with me Davy boy. The bloody house is mortgaged to the gills, those school fees – like murder – and the blackjack. It’s been a long run of shitty luck, I’m going to have to pack it in.’

‘Blackjack! You’ve been gambling – you’ve been wot? Why didn’t I know?’

He stood up, his boots gleaming in the light, ‘Why should you know. My bloody Missis didn’t know. Since when do I account to you fella?’

I was close to losing it, had to pull back. I could see a roof in Battersea, see my father’s eyes.