Chapter 1.

"Mama! Mama!" Where was she? I felt so alone, even though a kitten was cradled in my arms, and even though some people were near me. The people (two of them) were very old. They weren't exactly strangers, but I didn't feel connected to them in any way. They stood and watched wordlessly as I called for my mother. "Mama! Mama!"

I woke up with a start, and it took me a second to realize that I was safe in my own room. The dream had been so real. I could almost smell the musty, closed-in odor of the big building I'd been standing in. I could almost feel the softness of the kitten I'd held. And I could almost understand the loneliness and the fear of the little girl who felt so all alone.

I rubbed my eyes hard, as if I could erase the dream and the strange feelings that went with it. I hated that feeling of loneliness, and

I hated not knowing where I was, and why those old people were staring at me. Actually, I wasn't even sure if the person in the dream was me — if she was, she was a very, very young me. One who knew how to say just one word. Mama.

By this time you're probably wondering who "me" is. I don't blame you. I am Mary Anne Spier, and I'm not normally a person who has weird dreams. I'm basically just your average, typical thirteen-year-old eighth-grader. I've lived all my life in a town calledStoneybrook,Connecticut. I have lots of good friends (in-chiding a steady boyfriend), a kitten named Tigger (he's gray, not black and white like the one in the dream), and a stepsister (who also happens to be one of my best friends) named Dawn Schafer.

What I don't have is a mother. I haven't had one since I was a baby. In fact, I really have no memories of my mother at all. I don't remember her being sick, and I don't remember her dying. So I guess I can't say I miss her, since I didn't really know her. But I sure do miss having a mother.