I am fully starting to hate ithere. Everybody at school was all, 'Oh you are so lucky, you get tospend Christmas in a castle being waited on hand and foot. . .'
Well, believe me, there isnothing so great about living in a castle. First of all, everything init is really old. And yeah, it's not
like it was built in 500AD or whenever it was that my ancestress,Rosagunde, first became princess or whatever. But it was
still built in, like, the 1600s and let me tell you what they didn'thave in the 1600s:
1. Cable TV
2. DSL
3. Toilets
Which is not to say there isn't asatellite dish, but hello, this is my dad's place, the only channels hehas got programmed
are like CNN, CNN Financial News, and the golf channel.
Where is MTV 2,1 ask you? Whereis the Lifetime Movie Channel for Women?
Not that it matters because I amspending all my time being run off my feet. It isn't as if I ever evenget a free moment to
pick up a remote and go, 'Ho hum, I wonder if there's a Tracy Goldmovie on'.
No. I mean, even now I amsupposed to be taking notes on Grandmere's lecture about the importanceof sticking to the prepared script during televised public addresses.Like I didn't get it the first time she said it, or the nine-hundredthtime, or however many times it has been since Christmas Eve, when Isupposedly ruined everything with my treatise on plastic
six-pack holders.
But let's say I even did get a