For a second I am afraid that Spyder is going to go after Massha for the 'Missy' comment, but she doesn't. This is a good thing, as Massha not only outweighs her on a factor of five or six to one, but also packs a mean magikal wallop in some of the jewelry she wears.

"That's how you all see him," Spyder sez, "and I'm inclined to believe you, mostly because I trust the Swatter and Nunzio. You've got to look at it through outsider's eyes to understand what's going on.

"Skeeve definitely has the Queen's ear, that much you admit. Then there's the rumor that he consorts with strange, otherworldly creatures." She pauses and looks pointedly around the room. "And some say he's guarded by a ferocious dragon." She nods toward Gleep, who cocks his head at her. "And, finally, there's persistent talk that he has underworld connections and is supported by local organized crime."

She pointedly does not look at Nunzio and me, but the message gets across.

"Not to offend the current company, but the citizens are thinking that 'If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck...' " She lets the sentence trail off. "Anyway, whatever the truth is, that's what the talk is that's going around the kingdom. General Badaxe thought you should know."

I let the silence drag on for a few minutes as the team digests what they've heard.

'Thank you, Spyder," I sez at last. "I guess the big question, and the reason I called this meetin', is: What are we going to do about all this?"

"I think you were right, Guido." Aahz sez. "Both for calling the meeting and for thinking that it's best if Skeeve didn't hear about this."

"I'll have to second that," Chumley sez. 'The lad's never been particularly good at handling women, and this thing with Queen Hemlock has him tied up in knots. I say let's look into this ourselves and let Skeeve focus on his other problems."