So how do ants stay so fit? The answer is surprisingly simple: they have no mouths. And this is a good thing, really, because it means they can’t scream when you spray them with Raid, although they do their best to writhe around in a piteous manner.
So anyway, what we have, in the ant, is a creature that engages in strenuous physical exercise all day long and never eats any thing. This is Nature’s Way to fitness, and we should emulate it if we wish to have the kind of taut, firm bodies that make ants the envy of the insect kingdom. Of course, we must always weigh this against the fact that they have a life span of maybe six weeks and are subject to attack by vicious beetles.
So the Bottom Line Is ...
... now is the time to start that fitness program! Fitness is more than just another new “craze,” like flavored popcorn or parenthood. Fitness is a philosophy of life, a revolutionary new concept in personhood, and, ultimately, a way for people like me to become wealthy via the sales of fitness-related items such as this book.
But people like me can do only so much. We can take your money. After that, it’s up to you. If you don’t follow the diet and exercise program outlined in this book, it won’t do you a bit of good. Even if you do follow it, it may not do you any good. Nobody really knows what will happen. You’ll be the first person who ever actually tried this particular program. I meant to try it myself, before the book got published, but I had to buy snow tires. So maybe it would be a good idea to have a friend try it first, as a sort of test, and watch to see whether he actually does become fit, or starts lapsing into lengthy comas or something.