Could it be that a man too cool to smile had made her hot, hot, hot for the first time in she didn't know how long?

Could it be that she'd felt a jolt of connection with that man? An instant affection, even? How was that possible?

"Woo, Emma! That was one fine specimen!" Velvet Miki leaned her petite body up against the wall next to Emma and giggled.

"He's a nut job," Emma said, slowly opening her eyes.

"Hon, I wasn't talking about the little d-o-g-I was talking about the big hunk of m-a-n." Her assistant then shoved the next patient's chart toward her, and Emma read that Harpo the self-mutilating parrot was preening himself bloody again.

"So was I, Velvet," Emma said, staring ahead blankly. "So was I."

* * *

"Damn you, Slick, you sneaky dead fembot!"

Thomas sat in the Wit's End parking lot and thumped his forehead against the car steering wheel, feeling a pair of soulful eyes follow his every move. He glared toward the passenger seat.

"Is there some other way in which I might be of service to you?" he asked the dog. "Speak up, pal. I'm all ears."

Uh-oh.

You don't like me much, do you, Big Alpha? I'd like it better if you took me back in there to the lady with the soft hands.

"You know what I'd like, Hairy? I'd like you to get a grip on yourself. Move on with your life."

Move on? If you'd only heard that bad man's voice, smelled all the anger in him, saw how he banged Slick's head with the blender!

And the noise! The blender kept screeching and whizzing! It hurt my ears! My brain! I hate the blender! I hate the blender! I miss my master! I miss my home!

Uh-oh.

I just peed again.

"Jesus, Hairy!"

I'm such a bad dog.