"You're not angry?" Chapter

THREE

J

ane said, "No, I'm not angry. Before I asked you about the ring, I gave a lot of thought to a wedding. Here is how it's going to go. First, it happens when my parents can be there. They're in Denmark right now. Dad's translating for some Americans who want a contract to do something about drainage in Denmark.

"Second, when my parents come, we'll have the real

wedding in front of a judge with just family. Shelley, as my

matron of honor, my kids, I probably have to invite my

mother-in-law, Thelma, and whoever you want as best man.

"Third, Mel, there are things your mother cannot do.

That Christmas she spent here she asked me what the

green and white leaves I had in a bowl were called. I told

her they were ivy. She said she had some sort of the same

thing on a tree in her yard, but it was bigger, darker, and never got red berries. I had to explain that they didn't get berries. Those were red beads I'd glued on. She wouldn't know a lily from a rose. So that's why I'm going to make the choice of flowers for my bouquet, and the flowers on the dining tables. I'll write all this down so you can tell her about it. And I'll also pay for the flowers and mail her a copy of the rules for her fake wedding. So she can't choose the flowers for the wedding she wants to do. And she can't suggest what I wear."

Mel, looking poleaxed, said, "Could your uncle Jim be my best man? I've always admired him."

"Good. That's who I would have suggested. He thinks the world of both of us.

"So that's settled." She didn't want to get distracted from her main theme. "There is a fourth set of rules. Your mother can foot the bill for the second wedding. She can choose the food. She can choose the wine and invite mobs of her professional friends. She can't add bridesmaids who are the wives, girlfriends, or daughters of her rich clients. Same for groomsmen. She doesn't choose the hotel or church where the wedding will be held."