“If it weren’t for you,” I said, “I’d probably be rolling in the gutter.”

“Instead of heading off to commit a felony.” She signaled for the check, then waved me off when I reached for my wallet. “Get out of here,” she said. “You didn’t have anything but H₂O and CO₂. The least I can do is pick up the tab.”

“If I get it,” I said, “I can call it a business expense. It’s a small price to pay for a clear head on a working night.”

“You figure tonight’s the night, Bern?”

“Well, the sooner the better.”

“Haste makes waste,” she said sagely, “and you’ve got to look before you leap.” She frowned. “On the other hand, you’ve got to strike while the iron is hot, and he who hesitates is lost.”

“That’s helpful,” I said.

“I hope so,” she said, “because it’s confusing the hell out of me. Maybe you shouldn’t have had that last drink. It went right to my head.”

“I’ll try to restrain myself next time.”

“Anyway,” she said, “this is on me. You’ve already got a lot invested in this business, haven’t you?”

“Six hundred and change.”

“All to get into the hotel.”

“In and out whenever I want,” I said, “just like a legitimate guest, which is what I am. It’s the one foolproof way to get past hotel security. Take a room, pay for it, and you’ve got the run of the place. Of course, you’re not entitled to break into the other guests’ rooms, but how are they going to stop you?”

“Your whole face glows when you talk about it, Bern. It’s something to see.”

“Well, it’s exciting,” I said. “A hotel is like a cafeteria for a thief, or a smorgasbord table. But instead of seeing everything all laid out for you, it’s all tucked away behind closed doors. And you never know what you’ll find.” I smiled at a memory. “One time,” I said, “I checked into the old Hotel Astor. It was early in my career and late in the life of the hotel, but we had that one brief moment together.”