"Pussy!" she said aloud, looking at her reflection in the mirror at the end of the tub. Her big blue eyes seemed so round, her white skin as pure as the porcelain of the tub. She touched the pink douche wand with long fingers, feeling the way the tip bulged out larger. That was where all the little holes were. That was where the solution squirted out deep inside her to wash away any…

"Wickedness," Josie said. She frowned. It was the first time she'd ever thought of it like that. But disease was wicked, wasn't it? And she'd been embarrassed when she'd found she was diseased, embarrassed that the doctor might think she'd caught something from a boy. But how could he have thought that? He'd had to make a minor incision in her hymen so that the enlarged tip of the douche wand would fit into her body. And she hadn't had a social disease, of course. Though sometimes she pretended that was exactly what she had caught. From a boy. A boy who forced her to submit in the back of his old car. They were naughty thoughts that always left her red-faced and ashamed. The thoughts left her tingling in a strange way too. Like she was now. But then she always tingled when it was time for her douche.

"I wish I could cover up that darned old mirror," she grumped, frowning at herself. But there was one at the other end of the tub too. Turning around wouldn't help. She opened the small jar of jelly she kept in the case and dug some out with a forefinger. She liked to take her time with this part. It made it better somehow.

Carefully she smeared the greasy lubrication over the tip of the douche wand. The bag was fat with water, hanging on the side of the tub. She had the valve closed until the wand was all the way in. She remembered the doctor's careful instructions. He'd even had a nurse show her where the hole was in her body, the hole that he'd cut there.