"'Well, boys, says she after a bit, 'what is it?

"I told her in as few words as possible what we wanted for Bill, and the price we could pay.

"'Those western appointments, says she, 'are easy. Le'me see, now, says she, 'who could put that through for us. No use fooling with the Territorial delegates. I guess, says she, 'that Senator Sniper would be about the man. He's from somewheres in the West. Let's see how he stands on my private menu card. She takes some papers out of a pigeon-hole with the letter 'S' over it.

"'Yes, says she, 'he's marked with a star; that means "ready to serve." Now, let's see. "Age 55; married twice; Presbyterian, likes blondes, Tolstoi, poker and stewed terrapin; sentimental at third bottle of wine." Yes, she goes on, 'I am sure I can have your friend, Mr. Bummer, appointed Minister to Brazil.

"'Humble, says I. 'And United States Marshal was the berth.

"'Oh, yes, says Mrs. Avery. 'I have so many deals of this sort I sometimes get them confused. Give me all the memoranda you have of the case, Mr. Peters, and come back in four days. I think it can be arranged by then.

"So me and Andy goes back to our hotel and waits. Andy walks up and down and chews the left end of his mustache.

"'A woman of high intellect and perfect beauty is a rare thing, Jeff, says he.

"'As rare, says I, 'as an omelet made from the eggs of the fabulous bird known as the epidermis, says I.

"'A woman like that, says Andy, 'ought to lead a man to the highest positions of opulence and fame.

"'I misdoubt, says I, 'if any woman ever helped a man to secure a job any more than to have his meals ready promptly and spread a report that the other candidate's wife had once been a shoplifter. They are no more adapted for business and politics, says I, 'than Algernon Charles Swinburne is to be floor manager at one of Chuck Connor's annual balls.



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