He lit up and blew smoke at me.

– Losers like me, Web. Losers like me.

I took the magazine from my pocket and opened it back up.

– Well I hope you enjoy the fatal case of cockrot youre gonna get if you nail that chick. -Jealous.

– Gonna be like this movie Corrosion.

– Bitter.

– Your flesh being eaten away.

– Cynical.

– Consumed by the billions of infected sperm monkeys that have been pumped into her by the Beverly Hills High football team since she was thirteen.

– Hostile.

– Excoriated to a nubbin with a shriveled sack hanging off it.

– Excoriated?

– Look it up.

– I know what it means.

– No you dont.

– Pretentious.

I threw the magazine at him.

– I am not fucking pretentious.

He caught the magazine and rolled it tight and counted points off his fingers with it.

– Jealous, bitter, cynical, hostile and pretentious.

I got up and grabbed at the magazine.

– And Im not jealous, not of a rag like that.

He jerked the magazine away.

– Excoriate my ass.

– You wouldnt say that if you knew what it means.

I slapped the cigarette from his mouth into his lap and he jumped from the chair, whacking at the embers on his crotch with the magazine.

I shoved him.

– Cool it, thats a new issue.

He swatted the top of my head with it.

– You are such a dick.

– Fuck you.

I grabbed him around the middle and pushed him back into the chair and he smacked me across the ear with the magazine.