I knocked back some more white. If this went on I was going to need a bottle. ‘Colin needn’t have worried. After the time in court I never laid eyes on you again. Anyway, indoorsmen make more money than outdoorsmen.’

‘That’s the sort of half-smart thing you used to say. It made me mad.’

‘I know.’

She leaned forward across the table and I could feel the intensity in her. ‘Tell me, Cliff, are you… in a relationship at present? I assume there’ve been a few over the years, but…’

I desperately needed something to do with my hands and if there had been cigarettes available I would have taken one. I put both hands on the wine glass and swilled what was left of its contents. ‘Look, Cyn,’ I said. ‘You’ve told me about the cancer and it’s just about the worst thing I can remember hearing. But where’s this going?’

She leaned back and drew a deep breath. The effort of doing it seemed to cause her pain and she aged ten years as she fought for composure. ‘Cliff,’ she said softly. ‘I was pregnant when we split up. I dithered until it was too late to have an abortion. The child was born. A girl. You’re her father.’

2

My first reaction was disbelief. This had to be some kind of fantasy, a product of the treatment she was having or a mental aberration associated with the disease or the prospect of death. It couldn’t be true. Cyn read me right immediately.

‘You don’t believe me.’

‘I’m sorry, no.’

‘It’s true, Cliff. You remember how it was. I hated you. I wanted nothing more to do with you, ever. It’d all gone so terribly wrong. Everything we’d planned had turned to shit.’

I nodded.

‘I had the baby in Bathurst at a Catholic hospital. I used my own name and I didn’t tell anyone about it. Not even my parents. Look.’