”I need to talk to you,” Landers said, and she led him inside. He plunked down on the first bar stool he came to. The place was dark and smelled of stale cigarette smoke and animal fat. A mirror ran the length of a long wall opposite the bar. Landers checked himself out as Patti walked around the bar and back towards him. He liked what he saw.

”What’s the difference between a sperm cell and a TBI agent?” she said. Patti loved to bust his chops.

”Go ahead, slay me,” Landers said. ”What’s the difference between a sperm cell and a TBI agent?”

”A sperm cell has a one in a million chance of becoming a human being. Can I get you something to drink?”

”A Pepsi, and I have a photograph I want you to look at. Do you mind?”

”Are you doing real police work?”

”I am.”

”Hey, Lottie,” Patti called towards the kitchen.

”Special Agent Phillip Landers here is doing real police work in my little old bar. He wants me to help him. What should I do?”

”Deny everything,” a voice called back. ”Ask for a lawyer.”

”She doesn’t like you,” Patti said. ”She says you have a small penis.”

”You know better than that,” Landers said with a wink.

”I was drunk, dickhead. I don’t remember your penis.”

Landers slid the photo of Tester onto the bar. ”Any chance this guy was in here yesterday evening?”

Patti nodded. ”Came in about six, sat right over there in that booth.” She pointed behind Landers. ”I waited on him. Ordered a cheeseburger and fries.

Drank two Blue Ribbons. Nobody drinks Blue Ribbon anymore. I remember thinking he wouldn’t have looked too bad if he lost some weight and shaved those goofy sideburns.”

”I don’t think he’ll be shaving anytime soon.