”Neither one of us ever said a word to anyone, including each other. When that sorry piece of shit drowned a year later, it was one of the best days of my life. I tried to get him out of my mind after that, but I couldn’t do it. Obviously, neither could Sarah.”

I sat back in the chair and let out a deep sigh. ”So now you know.”

She hadn’t moved since I started talking. She lay there, barely breathing, staring at nothing, blinking occasionally.

”I can’t believe you didn’t notice the changes after that day. I can’t believe you never even bothered to ask what was wrong. I might have told you about it, and maybe you could have done something to help Sarah. But you were too busy feeling sorry for yourself, weren’t you? You’ve spent your whole life being miserable, and now it’s over.”

I looked for some telltale sign that she understood. Nothing.

”Did you hear a word I just said? Did you hear?

Ma? ”

There was a knock and the door opened. A nurse’s aide stepped tentatively into the room.

”Is everything all right?” she said. ”I thought I heard someone shouting.”

It took a few seconds before I understood what she was saying. I suddenly realized where I was, like I’d just been awakened from a deep sleep.

”Everything’s fine,” I said. ”Please close the door.”

She turned and left. I got up from the chair and looked down at Ma.

”I guess I better go now. I’m glad we had this little talk.”

April 12

4:00 p.m.

Shitdammit. Erlene Barlowe missed Gus more than ever. He’d have been better than her at handling the TBI agent. As soon as she got away from him in the parking lot, she sat down at the bar and asked herself what Gus would do. She was worried. The TBI man didn’t strike her as the type she could hold off for long. She knew he’d be back, and she knew it would probably be soon.