‘Private investigator,’ I said, correcting him. ‘It has its moments.’

‘What sort of things do you investigate?’

‘Almost anything, except divorce. People act funny when they’re being cheated by their wives or their husbands, or when they’re the ones doing the cheating. I was once engaged by a woman to tell her husband that she was planning to leave him. She was afraid he’d pop her. So I told him, and, what do you know, the son of a bitch tried to pop me. I spent three weeks in St Gertrauden Hospital with my neck in a brace. That finished me with matrimonial work permanently. These days I do anything from insurance investigations to guarding wedding presents to finding missing persons – that’s the ones the police don’t already know about, as well as the ones they do. Yes, that’s one area of my business that’s seen a real improvement since the National Socialists took power.’ -I smiled as affably as I could, and wiggled my eyebrows suggestively. ‘I guess we’ve all done well out of National Socialism, haven’t we? Proper little March Violets.’

‘You mustn’t take any notice of Bernhard,’ said Dagmarr. ‘He has an odd sense of humour.’ I would have said more, but the band started to play and Dagmarr wisely led Buerckel on to the dance-floor, where they were applauded warmly.

Bored with the sekt that was on offer, I went into the bar in search of a real drink. I ordered a Bock and a Klares chaser, which is a shot of the clear, colourless potato-based alcohol I have a taste for, and I drank these fairly quickly and ordered the same again.

‘Thirsty work, weddings,’ said the little man next to me: it was Dagmarr’s father. He turned his back to the bar and watched his daughter proudly. ‘Looks a proper picture, doesn’t she, Herr Gunther?’

‘I don’t know what I’m going to do without her,’ I said. ‘Perhaps you can persuade her to change her mind and stay on with me. I’m sure they must need the money. Young couples always need money when they first marry.’