“…And I know you didn’t have no other bitch in my mother-fucking shit, either. I knew I shoulda never fucked with your sorry, black ass. You ain’t shit, nigga. For real! I want my fucking car, NOW! And you better bring my shit back to me with a full tank of gas.”

“Or what?”

“Nigga, you’ll see.”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” I say, takin’ another big-ass pull to the head. Who the fuck this bitch think she is tellin’ me what the fuck I better do? Now, you already know she done fucked up, right? I pull the phone away from my ear, allow her to continue her bullshit-ass tirade. She’s talkin’ so fast that she starts to sound like one of the muthafuckin’ chipmunks. But, on some real shit, I…DON’T… GIVE. A. FUCK. I press End, then flip my phone shut. She calls back. I let it go into voicemail. And now, the bitch is gettin’ real belligerent wit’ it, callin’ back to back to back. I turn the shit off.

When I finally get to exit 136 off the Garden State Parkway, I open my cell, turn the shit back on, then hit Akina up. She’s this half-Japanese, half-black hottie I’ve been fuckin’ for a minute. And the chick’s sittin’ on paper from money her grandparents left her when they died. Plus, her moms is a big-time criminal lawyer and her pops is a doctor, so chick wants for nuthin’, feel me? Man, listen…this bitch is fiyah, fo’ sho. And the best thing is she’s a certified ass-lickin’, ball-suckin’, cum-gulpin’ freak wit’ one of them basketball booties you can palm and smack ’round all night. She’s flat-chested as hell, but the ho gotta deep, wet pussy that slurps up the dick and gushes like a waterfall.

“Heeey, baby,” she coos into the phone.

“What’s good, ma?”

“You, and all that pretty dick. When am I gonna see you? We miss you, boo.”