Twenty minutes later, this crazy smut comes back and starts bustin’ my mom’s front windows out with a baseball bat. Now, you know a nigga was wrecked when I heard glass smashin’ ’n shit. I slipped on my boxers and ran through the house, swingin’ open the door, goin’ outside to see what the fuck was goin’ on. This nutty bitch started chasin’ me around the yard with the bat, tryna swing off on me, word up. She had my dick bouncin’ and swingin’ all ’round the yard tryna keep her ass from smashin’ my lights out. And the Spanish bitch snuck outta the bedroom window, then climbed over our backyard fence, bouncin’ on a nigga. A neighbor called the cops. And Jasmine’s psycho ass got locked the fuck up.

Needless to say, when Moms pulled up and saw her shit all busted out, she went noodles on a nigga, cursin’ and screamin’. She beat my ass so bad I thought she was gonna peel the skin offa me.

“I told your black ass about bringing all them nasty, trampy, hot-in-the-ass bitches up in my motherfucking house, didn’t I?…” Slash! Slash! Slash! She had a nigga runnin’ ’round yellin’ and screamin’ like a lil’ bitch. “…I told your motherfucking ass… No”—Slash—“bitches”—Slash—“in”—Slash—“my”—Slash— “mother”—Slash—“fucking”—Slash—“house…”

“Aaaaaah, Ma…I’m sorry…aaah…owww…”

“You just like your goddamn father, sneaky…” Slash!

“Owwww…I won’t do it again, I promise…ooooow.”

Seems like the more I apologized, and promised to not let it happen again, the angrier she got. She wasn’t tryna hear nothin’ a nigga had to say.