Nevertheless, I hastily moved away from the window, although not before my cheeks flushed crimson with embarrassment when Sally called out: it's all right, Mister Andrew. Believe me, I've seen more than that on a Saturday night after a good party.'

Oh well, I said to myself as I padded across to my en suite bathroom and switched on the hot water tap, at least this accidental exposure of my prick to feminine eyes would thankfully not lead to such an unpleasant experience as had recently been suffered by my house-mate, Teddy Carmichael.

True, my closest chum had only himself to blame for his misfortune since no one else had suggested that, after a convivial evening at the Jim Jam Club, he should be so foolish as to unbutton his trousers and relieve himself against a lamp-post. Anyhow, the long and short of it was that Teddy was charged with being drunk and indecent. After an uncomfortable night in the cells at Vine Street, he was hauled up at the police court and fined five pounds.

I chuckled as I recalled Teddy's gloomy observation that being a fiver out of pocket was bad enough but that the magistrate who had inflicted this monstrous sentence to the accompaniment of some very offensive remarks was none other than his godfather. This worthy would doubtless be writing to Teddy's parents before poor Teddy could dream up an excuse for his peccadillo.

With a savage scowl on his face, my pal had added: 'To add insult to injury, less than a week later there was an announcement in the Evening News that the old bugger was about to retire from the bench. I happen to know that my beloved godfather has a nice pot of money in the bank as well as a country seat and a thousand acres down in Devon. I'm telling you, Andrew, I wouldn't be surprised if the old swine stuck to some of the fines. Let's face it, five quid here, five quid there-you can see for yourself how it would mount up over a period of time.'