Doctor Teddy Parsifal Ford Manor Sussex, December 1886 My Early Days As my old friend Lady Pokingham has written, the natural instinct of the ancients was that copulation was the direct and most acceptable form of worship they could offer to their deities.

I am convinced that there cannot be any great sin in giving way to natural desires and enjoying to the utmost those delicious sensations with which the Creator has endowed us. So no apology will be forthcoming for the unashamed voluptuousness of this memoir and without further ado, let me begin my narrative. My earliest years were spent in Canada and India as my Papa was attached to the Diplomatic Service. I shall not bore you with the details but until the age of ten I had hardly lived in this sceptred isle of Albion more than six months or so. But on my eleventh birthday I was sent to school in England where my elder brother, Cecil (more of him will appear later in this tale), was already a student, though we returned home to Mama and Papa in the holidays wherever they happened to be living at the time. Even at this tender age I evinced a taste for the fair sex and I will never forget our governess, Mrs. Radlett, who proudly displayed what appeared to my young eyes an enormous pair of breasts in the tightest of bodices, creating a cleavage that caused many a visitor to make excuses to visit the nursery, the avowed purpose being to see the youngsters, but in reality to see Mrs.

Radlett bending forward. I recall that in Toronto (Mrs. Radlett travelled with us wherever Papa was sent on command of the government) one visitor, Doctor Dunn, always managed to drop his handkerchief or some other trifle so that Mrs. Radlett bent down to retrieve it. I realise now that the good doctor was not as clumsy as he seemed!